Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Copenhagen Love

For those of y'all who have not had the pleasure of ever expiermenting with Copenhagen, I lend my deepest sympothiese. Copenhagen has been satisfying customers since 1822, and had taken 4 years of my life that I could say that I was "Dip Free". I do love the stuff very much, but I quit my sophmore year of college for overall health reasons. Copenhagen is finely cut tobacco mixed with fiberglass to put in your bottom lip. It is quite an incredible sensation of tobacco buzz and burning; however, your first time to use such an incredible substance can prove to be a tad overwhelming.
During my last week at work at my internship, my boss was out of town. This led to me and another guy who actually works there to have a self proclaimed summer camp in the office. All week we jacked around, went to Starbucks, and caused trouble. On our way to a Starbucks the following conversation takes place

Bootstraps: Hey man, have you ever tried Copenhagen?
Co-worker who has done/is on hardcore drugs: No man I haven't

BS: It is pretty good stuff. Dude you should try it!
CW: I don't know man, It is a pretty Aggie thing to do (He went to UT)

BS: Allright then, it is your birthday though. (It was indeed his birthday)
CW: Thank You

CW: Hey, I kinda want to try it. Do you have any?

BS: No, but i will get some hold on.

I then at this point drive to the closest corner store and purchase a can of the brown goodness. I show the man how to hold, pack, and dip Copenhagen. Once we have everything situated this is what followed.

BS: How ya feeling man?
Slightly buzzed co-worker: Pretty good

BS: Dude you need to take it out if the buzz gets real hard.
Getting more buzzed Co-Worker: Man don't worry, I have had weed that is not as good as this.

BS: Ya doing ok?
Really Buzzing Co-worker: Woah man I need to get a blowjob on this. This is great!

BS: Careful....
Getting Sick Co-worker: Dude is it hot in here?

BS: No

(He is sweating profusley)

BS: Take it out
Sick Co-Worker that takes it out: Ehhhh AIR....Get back to the office

BS: Ok man

Wheels automobile into the office parking garage

BS: Dude here ya...

Co-worker opens the door, holds onto my bumber, and throws up all over the ground. He is at this for a solid 10 min. I begin to worry that somebody will come out and think we were doing drugs or something of that nature. After puking we get inside were he runs to the 1st floor bathroom. Here he gags a few more times and is still sweating. I had a meeting and left him there to talk to some lobby supervisor. An hour later I found him staring at his computer with his head in his hand swearing to himself.

Best part is, I got him to do it again that afternoon.


Anonymous Jess said...

You truely are trying to spread the Copenhagen love around... you succeeded in getting a beautiful and intelligent girl to like it. You must be good.

1:31 PM  

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