I Hate Lawyers...At least that is what I'm told
As most people know, when you are out drinking with your friends, or just out for that matter, you tend to strike up conversations volentairly or unvolentairly with people that are also out. Most of the times these conversations are plesant, but are quickly forgotten before you even leave. This is fine. This is expected. Sometimes the conversations go a tad deeper, and the other person asks what you do....Now, I am a very ethical person. I will go to extremes not to lie, and I am known to do as such, but I may begin to start lying. Here is why...This is a mock conversations between me, and just about everybody else that asks. I will cut to the mimddle of the conversation.
Seemingly Nice Person: So what do you do?
Bootstraps: I am a student
Seemingly Nice Person: Oh yeah what do you study?
Bootstraps: Well, I am a Law Student
Jackass: Are you kidding we don't need any more lawyers.
Bootstraps: (Laughs Politely) Well man you are probably right
Jackass: (Obviously very irritated) Seriously, I hate all lawyers, they are blood sucking, no good, lying, sacs of elephant dung.
Bootstraps: (Trying to play it off laughs again, but getting angry)
Jackass: Man, I thought you were cool, but obviously I was wrong. You are probably thinking of ways to sue me right now. What if I punch you in the face? You want to sue me then? I tell you Lawyers are the reason America is going to shit.
Bootstraps: HAHA (Swears this is the last time He will laugh trying to play it off)
Jackass: Sac of crap...
Bootstraps: Listen you ignorant little prick. Who is the first person you go whining too when things don't go your way? Who is first person you call when you get your drunk ass thrown in jail? Who is the first person you call when you get stiffed on a payment? It is not your momma. It is not your best friend. It is your lawyer. So you better sit there, shut up and drink your beer.
Jackass: (Suprised) You are going to make a good lawyer
Bootstraps: Thanks
I think I am going to say that I am going to say that I am a systems analyst for some computer company. Even though I don't know a thing about computers at least they will say oh thats cool and move on with the conversation.
And he was right. I was thinking of ways to sue him.
Seemingly Nice Person: So what do you do?
Bootstraps: I am a student
Seemingly Nice Person: Oh yeah what do you study?
Bootstraps: Well, I am a Law Student
Jackass: Are you kidding we don't need any more lawyers.
Bootstraps: (Laughs Politely) Well man you are probably right
Jackass: (Obviously very irritated) Seriously, I hate all lawyers, they are blood sucking, no good, lying, sacs of elephant dung.
Bootstraps: (Trying to play it off laughs again, but getting angry)
Jackass: Man, I thought you were cool, but obviously I was wrong. You are probably thinking of ways to sue me right now. What if I punch you in the face? You want to sue me then? I tell you Lawyers are the reason America is going to shit.
Bootstraps: HAHA (Swears this is the last time He will laugh trying to play it off)
Jackass: Sac of crap...
Bootstraps: Listen you ignorant little prick. Who is the first person you go whining too when things don't go your way? Who is first person you call when you get your drunk ass thrown in jail? Who is the first person you call when you get stiffed on a payment? It is not your momma. It is not your best friend. It is your lawyer. So you better sit there, shut up and drink your beer.
Jackass: (Suprised) You are going to make a good lawyer
Bootstraps: Thanks
I think I am going to say that I am going to say that I am a systems analyst for some computer company. Even though I don't know a thing about computers at least they will say oh thats cool and move on with the conversation.
And he was right. I was thinking of ways to sue him.
posted by BootStraps at 11:24 AM
3 Comments:
Yeah, who needs lawyers? Anyone who is thinking of attending law school, should just skip it and runaway with someone beautiful to the bahamas for 3 years. What do you think bootstraps?
LOL, You know right Jeth you are absolutely right, and should work on that right away. Do you have any person in mind?
Pick an exotic beauty...Spanish, Brazilian, Latino...they all would make perfect "runaway partners"..plus, they would make for good lookin' mixed kids.. if you chose to take the procreation path.
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